I recently decided to see how productive I could be without Facebook and Twitter. I still find myself thinking in 160 character limits and wanting to update my Facebook status with random nonsense. I’ll probably reactivate them eventually, I’m a radicalist and never will be, but in all honesty, I’ve accomplished much more in the real world without having to worry about checking online. 

Today I was listening to Slacker (you suck) and was surprised to hear the song Coffee and Cigarettes by Michelle Featherstone from the One Tree Hill soundtrack (on my John Mayer station? What is Slacker thinking? Why did I have to use my Pandora limit up?) While listening to this depressing song (of course it’s off of the teenage angst drama of the year) I imagined rethinking the lyrics. I imagine years from now country singers and Rap artist will write about giving up Facebook and Twitter instead of cigarettes and booze. Below are Featherstones lyrics rethought:

I gave up facebook and twitter
I hate to say it hasn’t helped me yet
I thought my problems would just dissipate
And all my pain would be in yesterday

I deactivated my accounts and stopped thinking in the 3rd person
And watched my bad habits get flushed away
I thought that that would keep my head on straight
And all my pain would be in yesterday

But it’s true
I’m still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit, I must quit, you

I thought that if I didn’t go and play Farmville
The sadness would get bored and go away
I thought that if I didn’t go astray
That all my pain would be in yesterday

But it’s true
I’m still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit, I must quit, you

I sold my computer and my smart phone
I thought that it was these that kept me low
I thought if only I could try and change
That all my pain would be in yesterday

But it’s true
I’m still blue
But I finally know what to do
I must quit, I must quit, you

I must quit, I must quit, Facebook and Twitter, I miss you!